22 May, 2011 at 11:32 (Uncategorized)

Christopher held Alice,
Close by his side,
And Alice knew she couldn’t
Feel better if she tried.

A sofa and a glass of wine,
And years of knowing how
to be and Christopher and Alice
can be happy then and now.

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I Awake

16 May, 2011 at 10:51 (Uncategorized)

I awake and immeadiately try
to claw my way back
to the fire and the ice and the storm
of your eyes in my dream.
I awake to such dreadful calm.
But still it lingers,
your look and that rain
in which we wandered
For years in the fire,
I keep expecting the storm
to begin, but I am awake
and this is no eye.
We do not stand looking, breathing together.
We are calm
and I try to claw my way back
to sleep.

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11 May, 2011 at 21:06 (Uncategorized)

I could live forever,
if it was within reach of your arms.
I could try for the stars,
if I had your hand at my back.
I could be
all that anyone never dreamed of
(least of all me)
if I knew
that you would answer my call.

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10 May, 2011 at 23:32 (Uncategorized)

“Alice,” said Christopher,
“Come here for a while.”
“Christopher,” said Alice,
“You really make me smile.”

Then in their world
Alice felt good
Christopher would say
“All went as it should.”

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10 May, 2011 at 18:31 (Uncategorized)

Numbers, Meanings
Obsessively apophenia
Faces inside the smiles
One three is three
Two threes are six
Three threes are nine.

This one’s mine;
what does it mean to me?
A summer smiling boy,
Just enough to tip me
over the edge
of my very own tree
I am sleeping below its branches
on some sorry hallow’en
I left her sleeping,
I was naked and alone

Meanings, Numbers
Pouring over pages of them
Unable to stop
Smiles and tears.
three six nine
three two one
nine six three

Numerous, numberless, varied,
I cannot stop
this tree
though I’m over the edge
gasping out
my very last breath
and you
daring me to go on as if
I hadn’t gone far enough
you’d never stop me if I had.

Meanings if I look
You smile as if I should


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A Thousand Smiles

10 May, 2011 at 18:26 (Uncategorized)

Still I quicken to your smile,
Who am I kidding?
Won’t I always?
There are a thousand smiles locked away
inside my memorial mind
to a thousand different lovers
I quicken to their smiles.
But never as I quicken to yours.

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9 May, 2011 at 16:02 (Uncategorized)

“Christopher?” asked Alice.
“Why are we so happy today?”
“Alice,” replied Christopher
“Because we are this way.”

“Alice?” asked Christopher.
“Why aren’t you happy now?”
“Christopher,” replied Alice
“I can’t remember how.”

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Sharp Edges

9 May, 2011 at 15:43 (Uncategorized)

Be Careful!
Those edges are sharp!
Oh…that’s what this is
You broke my heart?
Without my realising,
that takes some skill
and is that why
I’ve been feeling permanently ill?
No wonder then,
I’ve been obsessing on him,
Wonderfully safe,
Wonderfully him,
And emphatically not you.
Is this why they say
you treated me bad?
Because until this point
I really didn’t think you had.
I still don’t.
Be Careful!
I wish she’d look,
Those edges are sharp,
and yes, does it matter
that you broke my heart?
What shall we call this
Third time’s the charm?
Could it really be
there’s no power to this harm?

He just rose through my brain
That mocking voice,
that length of chain.

So is this it?
The start of the storm
I’ll be sure to keep
that whisky glass warm.

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No Apologies

5 May, 2011 at 16:07 (Uncategorized)

I didn’t know, just how much that hurt.
Because, it was a pretty thing,
a frippery,
I was in love with you, not her,
So why, would it matter,
what I asked you to say?
On your knees, heart in your mouth,
and my words at your fingers.
Every one a dalliance of pretty,
and meaningless
compared to the world of hurt
you know love is.
Will I apologise? Unlikely,
unless you can prove to me
there was no worth in the hurt
and then
I’ll take my pen and score
the blood inside my skin
onto this page for you.

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Double N

4 May, 2011 at 14:18 (Uncategorized)

Did I fall in love with him because I needed you?
I still do.
I can live without you, that is easy,
It will always have been too long.
Meet my lips with your eyes
and a breathe of smoke, half-forgotten.

Tell me, did I fall in love with him
because you had gone?
Have you missed me? I have been held
by his eyes and calmed
by his arms.
As only you had ever done
The echoes were too strong
I fell in love with him – then felt them
Stepped outside of his circle of light
and watched you both walk on.

Did I fall in love with you because I needed him?
I think so.
I can give myself up inside your arms,
Too easily, too fast, no explanation.
Meet my eyes with your lips
and that smile of some half-shared joke.

Tell me, did I fall in love with you
because he had gone?
Have I been wrong? I have been kissed
by your lips and shared
a drink with him instead.
But until he was gone
that look was yours alone
I fell in love with you – on a summer’s day
Felt your smile play across my mind
And ducked aside, only after all, ill-timed.

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